So, I am thinking that this particular memory goes in that category of “so-extremely-scary-at-the-time-but-so-completely-hilarious-later”.  What do you think, Autumn?  Well, besides a few shed tears and some elevated heart rates this morning, my birthday has been off to a great start so far!  Thank you, dear friend.  I love you!  Can’t wait to continue our tradition of strawberry pickin’ next year…just maybe at different, turkey-free farm.

Here are TEN things I learned from this particular photo shoot:

1.) Doing photography requires a lot of physical exertion.  We tromped up hills, down hills and pretty much all over downtown Raleigh (at least that’s how I felt).  I woke up this morning awfully, horribly, terribly SORE everywhere.  I think this is evidence for two things–one…photography is way harder than it looks and two…I am really out of shape.

2.) Being the sidekick/assistant, I have to be willing to get down low and a little dirty.  Lying on the ground, scratching up my elbows and contorting my body around K so I don’t ever, ever get in her way while she’s in her element.  The couple never looks at me, but yet I still have to capture wonderful, creative moments.  The challenge to think creatively really drives me.  I love it!

3.)  Taking photos (for me) is like a drug.  It’s addicting.

4.) I need to practice MORE.  I need to take MORE photos.  It took me a good 1/2 hour into the photo shoot to warm up and feel comfortable with my camera.  Which means I missed a lot of different locations and shots.

5.) If I am going to utilize natural lighting for photo shoots, I need to bring a snack/drink in my camera bag because the good natural lighting takes place over dinnertime right now.  K and I were pretty ravenous by the end.

6.) Designate a place for my lens cap, so I always know where it is.  Left butt pocket, right butt pocket, wherever…because it’s bound to get misplaced or lost.  I lost my lens cap last night and I’m pretty sad about it.

7.) Don’t be scared to shoot a picture, even if it is different or if I am not sure how it is going to turn out.  It’s always better to try than to not try.  K tells me this a lot and I think it’s helpful because I can always learn from my photos (the good and bad ones).  What was good, what was awful and what might be better for next time around.

8.) Kristin is RAD (this is one of her fave words)!!!!

9.) I am so thankful that by the grace of God, I have been given two eyes through which I can see the beauty of the world He has given us.  To capture even the smallest bit of His creation through the lens leaves me in awe.

10.) Pray, pray, pray!  K led us in prayer before the couple arrived and it was so good.  Even with photography, I desire that I would work as unto the Lord and not unto man.  I don’t want to be driven by fear and anxiety, but ask God to help me be creative for His glory!

So, I guess I’ll be taking more pictures soon hopefully!  Meanwhile, here are a few photos from last night’s shoot:

On the evening of March 1st, Ben was told by his boss that the company was being bought and that everyone would be out of jobs by the 12th.  Wow.  When Ben came home and told me this news, so many emotions rushed through my body.  Anger, fear and anxiety were probably the ones to top the list.  Having walked through the trial of unemployment in my own family growing up and walking through it with some close friends of ours recently, I knew that this was NOT something I wanted to go through.  Call me selfish and call me a wimp, but I prefer life to be easy and convenient.  I mean, don’t we all?  However, God knows me better than that and He knows that it is only through trials and hardships when I realize my utter need for Him.  So, as those next long 11 days progressed, I clung to God and His promises.  I made sure to surround myself with the Gospel ALL THE TIME…listening to sermons, listening to worship music, meditating on Scripture, reading my Bible with the kids.  What I have learned from that time is that I need to be doing this EVERY day.  Every day is a battle to believe God’s promises and to trust in His provision.  It’s just easier to ignore it when my husband is actually employed.

So, that first week in March zipped by.  Ben and I didn’t really know what we were going to do.  He had been job hunting for months, but to no avail.  We were under contract to buy a house in downtown Raleigh, but that would fall through as well with no employment.  Come June, we would have nowhere to live.  We really were at a crossroads and extremely discouraged.  But, God surrounded us with wonderful friends at our church who called and e-mailed words of encouragement.  They reminded us of how big our God is and how we had no need to worry.  We had offers from close friends to stay with them in their homes while we figured things out.  The love and support we felt was overwhelming.

Then things began to take a turn without us really knowing it yet.  The company that had bought Ben’s current company just happened to have a position open.  They had actually hired someone that first week in March, but it fell through the 2nd week.  Ben had a chance to interview 4 days before being unemployed and they offered him the position.  People, it’s a position for programming!  My husband is a designer, not a programmer.  But, they wanted him anyway.  His last day at Kenosis was on the 12th and he immediately started work on the 15th at North Star.  We were amazed!  Ben did not go one day unemployed.  The Lord knew our needs and provided.  I’m still in awe over this.

Our God is a PROVIDER.  He gives us what He determines is good for us, whether that is a new job or unemployment.  He is our Good Provider either way.  I have to remember this as I share with you the next part of this story.  Ben’s new job is in Burlington–a 1 hour and 10 minute commute from Wake Forest one way.  Eek!  Ben leaves the house at 6:10 AM and doesn’t get back until 6 PM in the evening.  I know that doesn’t sound terribly awful, but it is quite the transition for our little family.  I am used to having Ben work 5 minutes away!  Also, we are night owls.  We are accustomed to going to bed at midnight, but none of that anymore.  We gotta be in bed by 10 PM now (if not earlier!).  This is a challenge for us.  In addition, Ben and I just don’t have much alone time together.  With our other commitments and the long commute, Ben and I have maybe two nights a week where we can just catch up with one another.  This is when I am tempted to grumble.  I am tempted to grumble like the Israelites did when they were brought out of Egypt.  God delivered them in miraculous and powerful ways from the hands of the Egyptians who were oppressing them, but yet they still found reason to grumble.  I am the same way.  God gave my husband a new job the day after he lost his old job and I complain!  Chief of sinners, that is what I am.

However, a friend of mine e-mailed me yesterday some helpful tips on how to practically deal with this time of transition for our family withOUT grumbling.

1.) Have a heart of thankfulness.  Reflecting on God’s goodness toward me, not just in the provision of a job, but in the fact that He saved me even while I was still a dirty, horrible sinner.

2.) Be realistic in the expectations I set for myself.  With Ben being gone more and not having his help, I cannot resort to doing it all on my own.  I have been making a list of ten things to do with the highest priority ones at the top.  Whatever doesn’t get done rolls over into the next day’s to-do list.  Plus, it’s helpful for me to remember that only God gets His to-do list done.

3.) Take a break.  When I’m exhausted and the kids are fussy and crying at the same time and my house is a disaster, take the time to fall to my knees and plead with God to help me.  Also, taking a small nap in the afternoon with your kids is not a crime.

4.) Realize what I can or cannot do.  I have to say “no” sometimes to social events or even different ministry opportunities, however fun or good they might be.  My job is to take care of my husband, kids and home first.

5.) Rely on others.  Accept help from others when offered.  I tend to thrive on self-sufficiency.  How prideful is that, right?

So, rejoice with us and pray for us.  REJOICE because my husband has a job!  PRAY because it is hard to have him gone 60 hours a week, on top of our other commitments.  My desire is that as a family, we would endure with joy and perseverance so that Christ may be seen as more beautiful to those around us.  Thank you, friends!

As one who is trying so desperately to learn photography and actually be good at it, I have decided my friends Corey and Autumn and their new baby are gonna be my guinea pigs.  My goal is to take milestone photos of them and their baby to show the life and growth of sweet Elena, but hopefully also reveal a little growth in my skills.  We will see!  This great idea came from my friend, Kristin, and this particular blog post.

I mustered up come courage to do my first newborn shoot this past Saturday.  It was sooooooooo challenging and this is what I learned as a result:
1.) I don’t know how to use my flash.  Note to self: learn how to use it for indoor shoots.
2.) I don’t know how to do a newborn shoot.  They can’t pose according to your instruction.
3.) If planning on taking pictures of a newborn with minimal clothing on, ask the parents to turn up the heat in the house before coming over.  Wise, wise advice from Kristin (of course).
4.) I get really flustered and sweaty when I don’t know what I’m doing.  I need to pray hard before each shoot and depend on the Lord for the flow of creative juices.  This would better serve the people I’m taking pictures for.
5.) I have SO MUCH TO LEARN.  Wow, photography is not easy and I feel like I’m just learning the tip of the iceberg.  I am thankful for Kristin’s encouragement and advice, as well as the many photography blogs I’ve been stalking as of late.

But, enough about all of that.  Just take a look at this sweet newborn.  She’s so adorable…I could just eat her up.

Over the course of our marriage, we have had to work on implementing date nights into our weekly schedules.  It has not been easy for a number of reasons…

1.) When we first got married, we just didn’t communicate very well.  I had expectations, Ben had expectations, we would both get discouraged and we would avoid dates altogether.

2.) Eight months into marriage, we found out we were expecting our first child.  I battled some nausea and a lot of fatigue, so date nights were just not on the forefront of our minds.

3.) Then we had Joshua Lee and when you have kids, it means that they either come with you on your date (which means you’re not REALLY on a date) or  you have to hunt down a babysitter AND be willing to trust your child in another person’s hands.  Needless to say, we had a few dates, but not a lot.

4.) Then we moved to North Carolina, where we essentially had to start our lives over.  New church, new friends, new restaurants, etc.  Once we made some friends, we went on a few more dates, but they were still few and far between.

SO, WHAT HAVE I LEARNED?  Date nights are a luxury.  Don’t take them for granted, but ALSO…aim to have them often.  Ideally once a week, but we shoot for twice a month.  Whenever we come home from a date, Ben and I are rejuvenated in our love for one another.  It is so, so good to have several hours to talk about what God is doing in our hearts and lives without any distractions.  It is FUN to laugh and flirt with each other and hold hands like in our early dating days.  It is wonderful to be reminded of the reasons why I married Ben in the first place.  What are you waiting for, you married folks?  Go on a date!  Make time for it…it’s worthwhile for your marriage.

Let me tell you about our most recent date.  Thanks to our sweet and generous friend, Kristin, we were able to check out a snazzy restaurant called Thaiphoon Bistro a couple weeks ago.

Wow, was the food amazing (and spicy)!  Not only that, but the ambience and the decor of the place was right up our alley.  We were truly spoiled that night.  Afterward, we swung by Cold Stone and shared a small ice cream.  It was absolutely wonderful!  What a blessing it was to spend one-on-one time with my dear husband.  My encouragement to you married couples out there…the dating doesn’t stop with marriage!

You will be hearing more from us now.  The absence of blog posts was due to my own coming down with the flu.  When I wasn’t resting or sleeping, I was still trying to keep up with taking care of my husband and kids and accomplishing a minimal amount of housework.  Hopefully you will be hearing more from me, but maybe not as much since I am trying to get caught up on everything else that fell by the wayside.

Thank you to those who were praying for us and loving on us by bringing us meals and just calling.  We are so blessed to be surrounded by people from our church who are so quick to serve.

Anyway, a few updates…

• February was a short month, so we were able to come in under our $175/month food budget.  I am hoping that this will the be first of many months we can do this!
• One of our new financial goals for this year was to aggressively pay off my student loans totaling $10,000.  We have been able to cut that in half!  Praise be to God who has blessed us with a hefty tax return and side-job opportunities for my hubby.  We’ve been able to throw that extra income toward our school debt.
• Our house is actually FOR REAL being built now, so we are looking to move into our first home in about 90 days.
• Ben has been juggling his many responsibilities well and even managed to get Google Analytics-certified amidst his crazy schedule.  Yay, husband!
• Homeschooling has been going well for Joshua Lee and I.  He is now able to read most of his board books out loud and is eager to tackle hard words like “extinguisher” and “xylophone.”  My oldest loves to read!
• Caleb is becoming more and more verbal.  A few new words he says are: “ight” for “light”, “moo” for “moon”, “nana” for “banana”, and  “di-pah” for “diaper”.  He is such a little ham and he loves to be funny.
• We have lots of visitors lined up who are flying in to visit with us starting in mid-March through the beginning of May.  The Mellings, my mom and my brother, my sister and then my dad…we love it!

That’s it for now.  Come back soon for more blog posts of my grocery shopping trips, meal plans, pictures of my coupon binder, etc.

• The One who loves me steadfastly.
• The One who died on the cross to save me from my ugly sin.
• The One who has redeemed me and made me one of His very own.
• The One who is faithful toward His children, even when they are faithless.
• The One who gives eternal life.
• The One who saved me from God’s wrath and showered me with His mercy by the shedding of His blood on the cross.

2.) Ben

• My dear husband who, with God’s help, has led us through thick and thin.  He has seen me on my worst days and yet chooses to stay married to me!
• My dear husband who shares my first love, Jesus.  Ben loves our Savior more than life itself.  He even loves Him more than me and the boys…that is totally fine with me.
• My dear husband who tirelessly works hard to provide for our family’s needs.  He has a full plate of responsiblities, but even on the most stressful and discouraging work days, he is not prone to grumble.  I could stand to learn a lot from him.
• My dear husband who loves our boys so much.  Some of his favorite things to do with them lately is to tackle and tickle them until they can barely breathe.  Reading the Chronicles of Narnia and the Bible with them are also a high point of his day.
• My dear husband who seeks to serve others.  I often find him joyfully attacking the pile of dishes in the sink after dinner, taking out our stinky trash, washing out poopy cloth diapers or cleaning up the Leggett home after community group.
• My dear husband who always lets me have the last French fry, brings a glass of water to put on my nightstand at bedtime, warms up the cold sheets for me, puts gas in my car so I don’t have to, watches cheesy figure skating movies with me, and doesn’t get mad at me when I accidentally shave a bald spot on his head while cutting his hair.  This list can go on and on.  I love you, hon!

3.) My little boy, Joshua Lee

• My little boy that loves to spend time with me and looks forward to going on our donut date later this week.
• My little boy who is growing in His knowledge of the Lord.
• My little boy who loves his little brother so.  He helps Caleb lift heavy things.  He helps Caleb get unstuck from cramped spaces.  He tickles and tackles Caleb, sending Caleb into serious giggle fits.  He has compassion on his little brother when Caleb is hurt or sad.
• My little boy who has a tender heart.  Though he never got to meet Uncle Lee, he cries about his death.  He asks if people he holds dear loves Jesus; if they don’t, he immediately prays that they would.
• My little boy who never complains about being sick, going to the grocery store or having his normal routine interrupted.  Ben has apparently set a great example for him.
• My little boy who astonishes us with his intelligence.  Yesterday, he plopped down on our couch and started reading PARAGRAPHS out loud to his Daddy.  What???  Where did that come from???

4.) My littlest, Caleb Benjamin

• My littlest that still likes to be a snugglebug, even at 15 months old.
• My littlest who looks so much like me it boggles even my own dad.
• My littlest who loves toys that start with the letter “B”…balls, balloons, bears, books.
• My littlest who likes to hear words.  He points his little finger at everything and grunts, his way of asking us to name what he’s pointing.  One day out of nowhere, he will probably start talking in full sentences and I will probably poop my pants when he does.
• My littlest who loves his big brother, following JL all over the house (sometimes to JL’s dismay) and imitates what he does.
• My littlest who loves to throw food all over our floor.  Feeding him is a disaster, which is a complete paradox to how his big brother was at his age.

4.) My family

• My Daddy…who is slow to speak because he is wise and measures his words carefully.  He has loved this daughter well and I know it is because he realizes how much he is loved by God.
• My Mommy…who continues to serve God, her husband and kids, even though God has brought many trials into their life.  She will still maintain that her joy is in the Lord.
• My sister, Jambutt…who is my favorite person to laugh with, who understands my fear of dots, who adores my kids and wants to hear about every single detail of their lives, and who is generous in blessing others.
• My brother, Jonathan…whom I have watched grow up into a young man.  It is a highlight of my year whenever I get to see him.  It means that many more chances to love on him well!

5.) My church family at TCC

• My family away from family.
• My family whom I seriously live life with.  You guys help me fight against sin, encourage me with the Word and continually love me despite my sins.
• My family who has embraced my kids and loved on them.
• My family whom I have learned so much from…about what it looks like to love Jesus, what it means to live in community, what it means to treasure the Word and how I can better care for my husband and kids with joy.
• My family, given to us by the Lord God Almighty.  We are united by the blood of Christ and I look forward to spending eternity with each and every one of you!

• God doesn’t care enough about me to heal me completely.
• I am all alone in my pain and distress with no one to help me…God doesn’t hear my prayers.
• I deserve to feel 27 years YOUNG…and not 27 years OLD.

So I have to turn my eyes and heart to Truth such as this…

• God does care about me and He loves me deeply.  That is why He has given me this “suffering.”  To rejoice in it, so that I turn myself to the hope I have in God.

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to  us. Romans 5:3-5

• I am not alone.  The Lord is always with me.  He will neither leave me nor forsake me.  Also, I am blessed to have my brothers and sisters at TCC who have offered to help me in various ways.  I am far from alone!

Blessed be the Lord!
For he has heard the voice of my pleas for mercy.
The Lord is my strength and my shield;
in him my heart trusts, and I am helped;
my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him.
Psalm 28:6-7

• I deserve nothing, except the severe wrath of God!  All that I have right now is way more than I deserve already.  Instead, the Lord has shown me His mercy and He has made me His child.  I am a daughter of the King!

For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a    good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we  have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled  to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life.  More than that, we also rejoice in God through  our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation. Romans 5:6-11

Meanwhile, I guess you’ll all be hearing a lot from me.  I’ve been trying to take it pretty easy, so I am resting on the couch a lot with laptop and cell phone on one side and Bible on the other and children tumbling around all over.  It’s a beautiful sight.

]]> http://wordpress.benandveronique.com/2010/01/some-things-just-never-go-away/feed/ 0 http://wordpress.benandveronique.com/2010/01/baby-shower-after-baby-shower-after-baby-shower/ http://wordpress.benandveronique.com/2010/01/baby-shower-after-baby-shower-after-baby-shower/#comments Fri, 29 Jan 2010 03:02:29 +0000 Veronique http://wordpress.benandveronique.com/?p=500374 This month has been one full of baby showers.  I know so many pregnant women that it’s not even funny.  And, no, I am not one of them!  This past Saturday, I helped to throw a baby shower for the Leggetts and managed to get a few cute pictures.  It was a fun event.  Good eatin’, wonderful peeps, fun games, cute gifts and an intentional time of prayer for the soon-to-be parents.

“e” is for “elena”

(l to r) Tiffany, Autumn, Amanda and me

Cute and creative diaper wreath by Tiffany

Colorful fabric banner by Amanda

An UH-mazing spread of food

Adorable cupcakes made by Amy

Autumn and Elena Faith–ready to be showered with love and gifts

The showering begins…

Sweet gift from Mama Dove (Autumn’s mom)

Itty-bitty girly clothes!

Gift bag made by Heather

Precious lamby by Lexie

Lexie, Autumn and Lamby

Autumn and Amy

Sarom and Autumn

Their baby girls are due just 3 weeks apart from one another.

Claire, Autumn and Kimberly

There’s Elena Faith…we can’t wait to meet her!

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